What is Sin
That depends. Do you mean the person, or the act? Is 'sin' an act? Is it a state of mind or being? Is it a malicious streak running red through your heart?
Doing bad things with good intentions. Does that count as 'sin;? Or does that fact that you're stealing that loaf to feed your family or killing that man to stop him murdering hundreds... does that make the act innately good, because your heart isn't slashed by Sin's vicious talons?
Then there's me.
Sin-sin-siree, there's no place for me.
I'm an ordinary guy. An 'Ordinary Joe'. No frills, bargain basement, shops own brand - though I don't think the local Tesco would even think twice about stocking any of me on their shelves. Watch where you put that price sticker mister!
Am I bad because bad things happen around me? Or rather, because of me? Is Sin sinful?
I think so. Well, people die. That's can't be good, can it? Believe me, please, please believe me - I don't want it to be like that. I don't want others to suffer at my hand, whether they feel my touch or are just touched by me. I would rather their cries didn't haunt me. I would prefer it if, instead of their deaths, I simply had my own life.
But I don't. It's not my life, is it? When my will is not my own, when the beast within me bursts forth to consume the innocent, that's not my life. I'm held hostage by a force not of my own creation. If I could expel it, I would. An exorcism. A cleansing.
But I don't feel dirty, just dirtied. I'm not possessed - I am the possessor. The demon isn't in me, it is me.
But it would be nice - it would be good - if that were not the case.
So.
Forgive me, reader, for I am Sin.
But does that make me SINful?
They call me Reverend. I suppose they would, considering my actual name. But I'm also the one who helps them. The one who listens. Is that because I'm the only truly sane one in here? I use the term 'sane;' very loosely, of course. But I don't fly off the handle like a witch after a bucketful of vodka. I know that there's no point in losing my temper as it's a sure way to be the pea in the princess's bed - the orderlies being the mattresses piled on top.
If I lose my temper - usually anyway - it's because I need to. It's because the screams are too loud and I need them quieting. it's because, ever so slightly, the drugs help me forget.
Anywho. I'm the Reverend. I almost said 'for my sins'... but I won't. The same people that called me that also called Benny the 'Bender' and Mickey 'Mucous'. I don't wear a white collar and I don't hold sermons. But, nonetheless, they call me the Reverend.
But I'm not religious. Not really. I think I believe in a higher power (well, considering my own 'talents' I have to believe in more than this mere mortal plane), but I'm not sure. I don't know if there's a single bearded guy sitting up there or a host of them, playing chess with our lives. Or even jackal-headed creatures walking around swinging ankhs. As such, am I even qualified to talk about what sin is or isn't?
Oh, I think I am. Don't you?
